


A Letter From A Friend

by wingchester



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Not Beta Read, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-22
Updated: 2013-05-22
Packaged: 2017-12-12 16:26:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/813602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wingchester/pseuds/wingchester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel has fallen, his home is locked and his brothers and sisters has burned. Like comets, they fell from Heaven down to Earth, and in between these perplexing, distressful events, Castiel turns to the only thing he knows to keep him grounded; Dean. He ponders over his journey, and what part Dean plays in it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Letter From A Friend

**Author's Note:**

> After the season 8 finale, I had a lot of feelings, especially about Castiel losing his grace as well as falling together with the rest of the angels as they were expelled from Heaven. To me, angels have always been energy, an essence and since I'm very fascinated by space - I can't help drawing parallels between the two. This is a little something that invaded my mind, and I just had to write it down.

You don't know what gravity you have. How I orbit around you, constantly drawn closer. No matter how far away I go – I always come back eventually. Invisible strings at the back of my shoulder blades, pulling, ripping, aching, burning.  
Sometimes I wonder if they really are strings, if I'm nothing but a marionette. A puppet, ruled by an invisible power, manipulating my every move. Except my feelings. But then I end up with you again, and I'm convinced that they are wings – not puppet strings.

You teach me how to move on my own, that there is no “God” who guides me towards my right path. With enough faith, and willpower, I can create my own road, rewrite my destiny.  
But then I wonder – does that make me God? And it gets to my head a little bit. It shifts the world under my feet for a while. Until you pull me down from the clouds, put my feet back on the ground, and makes me realize that it is in fact stable.

I'm sorry. This is all new – I know how to spread my wings, I know how to soar through the sky – but you never taught me how to land. I shouldn't apologize. You have done nothing wrong. I'm–... I feel sometimes, that this has all happened before. Perhaps on another axis.  
But that's irrelevant now, when my center has fallen, my home has been shut down. My family fell like comets, as they crashed, my entirety shattered. I orbit around you more now, because where else can I turn to?

You remind me of everything. You have stars scattered across your face, tiny constellations and the light inside you – the one that keeps you going, makes me think of the sun. You're my sun. Sometimes you explode, the energy you hold collapses in on itself, and you burst like a supernova. The beauty of it, is the starstuff you leave behind, the little creations that happens thanks to you.  
There's such intensity in your eyes, and the tiny ripples and movements under your skin, filled with intention. If we stand close enough, I can feel your heartbeat through your skin. It's a soft melody that brings me peace. I'm so content with you.

I hope that I can be the one who make you see stars someday. If I were to crash as a meteorite, I want to collapse onto you. Because I see hope coming to life in your eyes, like nebulae creating new stars, new families.

I'm sorry. I need you too.


End file.
